Don’t give me that write what you know crap because at 14 I didn’t know anything and because of it I stopped trying to write fiction and wrote poetry which is only ever about what you know, especially at 14. At 14 it sounded like wisdom at 47 I know it to be a trite little sentence given by people who can’t write (or who can but don’t want to let on how) to people who want to learn how to write at weekend workshops because they think it is fashionably bohemian like dabbling in watercolours, not people who do write and can write, people who write all the time and mostly in secret, people who write because they can’t not write, because words fill them up and bubble out, people who don’t need to be told what to write about because they mostly don’t know what it is they are writing about until it is finished. Write about whatever you fucking like – just write goddamn it! And by the way if you say show not tell one more time I will SHOW you the back of my hand and you can TELL someone who cares. You want advice? Here’s some advice: Don’t put an adverb and a verb together that someone else has already put together a trillion times before. Or if you do then don’t show the bloody thing to me. If you have something to say then say it, if you don’t then make it up and if you KNOW something then for God sake keep it to yourself.